Saturday, August 6, 2011

What to Do When You're Out of Bread

What to Do When You're Out of Bread 
(And Your Family Went Out to Eat Without You and You're Sitting Home Alone)

Step 1: Get read to go out for the night. This takes approx. 15 minutes of the hour and a half you have to kill.

Step 2: Sigh.

Step 3: Walk to the pantry 'cause you're starving. 
           Realize you have no bread. At all. Check the freezer. No bread.

Step 4: Walk to the fridge.
            Realize there is nothing remotely appetizing to eat. Everything that is would have to be made into a sandwich... oh, wait. No bread.

Step 5: Repeat Steps 3&4 with little variation.

Step 6: Sit on the couch, hopeless. Realize you killed another 5 minutes.

Step 7: Have an epiphany. You saw you had English muffins in the freezer they aren't bread, but couldn't you make a sandwich using one?

Step 8: Make a mini toasted Cajun turkey sandwich, complete with tomatoes and lettuce.

Step 9: Watch Say Yes to the Dress while eating the sandwich referenced in Step 8.

Step 10: Make another Cajun turkey sandwich because the first one was so good.

Step 11: Repeat Step 9.

Step 12: Want to repeat Step 10, but you ran out of turkey. Improvise.

Step 13: Make a mini cucumber sandwich on, yes, your third English muffin.

Step 14: Watch more Say Yes to the Dress. Feel very feminine and dainty because you are eating a cute little cucumber sandwich while watching a show about dresses.

Step 15: Go out for the night, feeling very accomplished.

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